Day 6. Eyes Closed. Mirror Self Portrait?
Day 6. In yesterday's portrait session, I mentioned exploring more of the non-physical aspects of this process. I first stared into the mirror until the physical world began to shift. I have bumped into 'mirror scrying' before, but it's not something I've explored properly. The first two are with my eyes closed after looking, and the last I maintained my blurring focus and did my best to draw the experience. This has been a very different experience to the others so far.
Day 5. Lay Down Double Look. Mirror Self Portrait
Day 5. I think I was a little harsh on these in retrospect, but I think expressing my immediate response is good. I didn't feel fulfilled from my first, so I decided to do another to see if that time of looking at myself would affect the second. I don't feel it did. I felt a lack of focus on the physical and non-physical. Lead me to the idea of testing doing these with my eyes closed.
Day 4. The Stand Still. Mirror Self Portrait
Day 4. I somehow once again made this an exercise in physical endurance. From that morning's breathing session, I became aware that my physical being is more than just my head.
Day 8. A Candle Lit Mirror Self-Portrait
Day 8. After yesterday's exploration of not being concerned with the 'physical reality' or the aesthetic outcome, today I went back to my approach of the earlier ones. This time by candle light. I think letting the previous portrait influence the next has so far been a good method of gaining something from these.
Day 7. Exploring Loss of Focus With Candle Light and Mirror. Mirror Self Portrait
Day 7. This turned into a very strange experience. I stared into one eye in the mirror and watched myself and the world shift and move. I aimed to capture these movements without 'drawing' accuracy getting in the way. The result was a portrait that I do not aesthetically like, but the experience was a freeing one that later impacted the following portraits.
Day 3. Watermelon Pain. Mirror Self Portrait
Day 3. I originally intended to just use this watermelon as a prop. The previous night I had seen a portrait of someone eating. I think those two ideas collided in my brain. It made a portrait of physical endurance.
Day 2. The Portrait Side Eye. Mirror Self Portrait
Day 2. I wanted to explore a different position in this one. You can hear my thoughts immediately after completing the portrait. This felt similar to yesterday’s as I start to understand how to work within these.
Day 1. Mirror Self Portrait
Day 1. The full sped up one hour process and my thoughts on the first of these mirror self-portraits.
It’s Time To Stare At My Face Once Again. Mirror Self Portrait
I’ve reached the 100 paintings of my dreams! I’m not planning on stopping painting them. I am going to explore some more self portraits. The 2 mirror self portraits I have completed so far have been enlightening processes. There’s a whole area in between the portraits and the dream paintings to explore. Here’s my thinking before I begin this journey of seeking more of myself.
I'm recording the process as a diary, documenting my thoughts immediately after completing each. The emphasis of this series is on the discovery, I have no idea which direction these will go. I will do my best to engage with the process unbounded.
Lessons from my Second Mirror Self Portrait
This was a little different from the last one.
On a mission to see myself but it feels like I fell into the trap of using my eyes. This time it didn't feel as awakening as the first time. Maybe because it wasn't completely new ground, it was involving and enjoyable again, I think the intensity of the process plays into this.
My First Mirror Self-Portrait Painting
I wrote this within an hour of finishing (mostly) this. I wanted to capture my intitial thoughts and response and as a consequense reads like a journal entry.
We just finished watching the 3 part Frida Kahlo documentary on BBC last night. Not that it inspired me, but it was in my mind while starting. I'm somewhat used to having my photo taken wearing our garments. 'Dressing up'. How do I want to present these shirts? What do they pair with? Etc. Like the Kahlo self-portraits. How do I want to present myself? There's the possibility to present whatever / however / whoever I want. I suppose even with a straight deadpan expressionless face I'm still choosing to present something to the world. This is me. Unavoidable.